Doubting

This is about doubting.
When everything inside the mind-body is broken open.
Waking up more sad than happy
with more questions than solutions.

Being frustrated for hours, days, weeks, months.
Feeling stuck.
Where does a spell begin and end ?
Big sign. This is the trigger.

———

Step 1

Pointing a system who doesn’t work, who makes no sense anymore.
It’s a specific timeframe.
It might be a job, a love relationship, sexuality, childhood, self love, any kind of traumas.
Unbalanced hurts.

Doubting come in a rush, sounding like a vampire.
A constant dishwasher in the stomach, slow, painful and quiet
What we have learnt is doubting is a bad thing
A self agony.

Doubting brings a new power inside us.
It survived by being difficult, inconsistent, self-centered, demanding, resistant and persistent
but it arise a need.
Something else beautiful is cooking.

Step 2

Identifying and assuming the frustrations.
So strong and scary as it is.
The inner protective shell in a body wants to go out.
The true identify is booming like a volcano.

The need to find something new.
more appropriate and unexplored are born.
Am I more interested in my future or my past ?
Everything is possible again.

Step 3

Breaking the routine become an evidence.
And it’s fun ! Am I ready for this ? Yes !
Because I was tired of conditioning.
Clean up the brain is so powerful.

Because we all want to be closer to ourselves.
Goal of life isn’t it ?
Across the time and space of silencing, of fear, of separation, of loss
how great is to be real and start over ?

We could stay in the bullshit,
survived by hiding, pretending in social media
But when you stuck on the ground floor
how excited is to create a new way to the moon ?

———

Doubting creates a new blank page to meditate.
What do I really want for myself ?
Be out of my comfort zone.
Think differently. Push back. Cry out.

So hard but so worth it !
My point is doubting is not a bad thing.
It’s only a way of new beginnings.
I loved it.

Written by me.

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